I turned off the water, grabbed a towel and opened the shower curtain. I was startled by the oldest boy who was quietly sitting on the toilet, and he got a kick out of my surprised squeal. Apparently he had been sitting there a while and I did not realize it. This is just one of the benefits of being Mom; you are never alone. While stepping out of the shower I teased the boy that he scared me and I didn’t know he was there. Why can’t they be this quiet when I want them to be?
I am drying off as I step out of the shower and he hits me with it. “Why do you have a tattoo on your butt Mommy?” In an attempt to stall the answer, I remind Mr. Observant that I have another one…right there. Like many other times I am caught off guard by a question by one of the boys, I simply fly by the seat of my pants. “Why do you ask buddy, do you not like Mommy’s tattoo?”.
This is one of those many times one of the boys teaches me something. They are constantly making me stop and reflect on myself and my beliefs, making me a better person. My little man, wise beyond his years, looks at me and says “Mommy, it doesn’t matter if I like it. It only matters if you like it.”.
All I could do was smile with pride. Where does this kid get it? I know he does not get it from me, and Daddy is less open minded than I am. Little Man then proceeds to tell me about a picture he drew at school that one of his classmates did not like, and evidently was not shy about sharing her opinion. The incident with the picture at school had made an impact on Little Man. He told me he liked the picture and did not care if others felt differently. YOU GO BOY!
I am not sure how long he was sitting there, waiting for me. After my schooling on confidence and what others have to say about me, he got up and walked out like nothing happened. If he only knew.
In the twelve years hubs and I have been together, we have spent a number of nights apart that I could count on my hands.In the twelve years hubs and I have been together, we have only had separate careers for all of a year, maybe two.Most responses I get from others hearing this for the first time is something like “wow, you must really like each other” or “I could never tolerate my spouse that much”.We will both readily admit that hubs has the patience of Job and should be sainted for dealing with my antics, so he is really the one credited with our success all this time.
Like many couples, hubs and I met at work. However, after that organization moved us around the country together for a couple of years, we started a business together.Now it just feels odd to get up and do separate projects.We have a good rhythm to our routine; he has his strengths, as do I, and they fortunately compliment each other’s weaknesses.We are a good team.
It is really odd when you temporarily lose your right hand.The left hand tries to pick up the slack but can never fully complete the task.The man has a semi-annual fishing trip with his family friends at The White River.The trip is so good for him.He bonds with his man people; doesn’t shave for days, smoke cigars, plays cards, and occasionally gets a line wet.He comes back better than when he left; with his axe sharpened. He tells me bits and pieces of stories that he feels are acceptable for my “virgin” ears and he counts the days until the next trip.
This year he threw in an extra special trip to Canada with one of his brothers and his step dad.He was gone A WHOLE WEEK.I was a little worried (read: freaking out) when I heard how long he would be absent from our daily routine.My saving grace was the fact that the boys do go to preschool a couple of days a week.I knew I would be able to get some things done, or stare off into space like a zombie while they were gone.In preparation for his departure, I cleaned the place like my mother was coming to visit, freeze some easy to reheat meals and plan lots of activities to keep us busy and make the time fly.
Funny thing happened that week though; it wasn’t bad.Sure, I missed him; and so did the boys.Much to hub’s dismay we only had one night of dramatic “I miss Daddy” theatrics; and frankly that was because they were in trouble and think Daddy will save them from Nazi Mommy. Things ran as they normally would, some days even better (don’t tell Brad).I was even able to do some things I normally wouldn’t be able to do with Brad around.Most of you that know us might ask “what on earth does he not let you do”?First thing I did was go to the store and stock up on wine; then I came home and rearranged the furniture and finally….wait for it….it is s a biggie.I let the boys play with the shaving crème in the bath tub!As far as the three of us were concerned, the week was a success.
Fast forward to my girls trip to Florida this week.I too, will be gone A WHOLE WEEK.My already high anxiety level has now doubled. I know I will have a blast in Florida even though I am missing all my friends at Blogher.I also know that I cannot wait to start counting waves while catching up on my vitamin D therapy and my stack of books.I am, however, a little worried about what I am going to come back to when I get home.I know hubs is completely capable of caring for himself and the boys and the house, but have some issues with how effective they will be trying to do all of it at the same time.
The whole idea of these trips got me thinking about that saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder”.Although it is the case when I am apart from Brad, it is not always true with other scenarios.Does absence truly make our hearts fonder, or does the separation just give us the opportunity to learn that we are just in a situation of convenience.I suppose that is where the saying “out of sight out of mind” originated.When I presented this idea to hubs he laughed and asked, “are you worried I will learn to like to live without you while you are gone?”.Once my nervous laughter was over, I reminded him that he may be able to do so, but he doesn’t want to.
What do you think? Is it the subject matter (people, place, or thing) for which you long, or is it the fact that you just are away from it? From what have you recently been separated and what was it like when you reunited; was it what you expected?
If predictions by the Oxford Hair Foundation come to pass, the number of natural redheads everywhere will continue to dwindle until there are none left by the year 2100. The reason, according to scientists at the independent institute in England, which studies all sorts of hair problems, is that just 4 percent of the world’s population carries the red-hair gene. The gene is recessive (and therefore diluted when carriers produce children with people who have the dominant brown-hair gene. Dr. John Gray’s often publicized explanation of his foundation’s findings: “The way things are going; red hair will either be extremely rare or extinct by the end of the century.” The gene responsible for red hair - known as the melanocortin 1 receptor, or MC1R - was only discovered in the late 1990s. People have a good chance of being born with red hair if they have a mutation of that gene. Red hair is found in all ethnic backgrounds but is most commonly associated with people of Celtic descent.Maybe I need to have my friend the rocket scientist (ok, ok, genetic researcher) look into this…let me know your thoughts T.
I have a few thoughts about this possibility:
~Thank god I will be gone because a world without Red is no place to live!
~“Studying all sorts of hair problems”; who decides that is what they want to do with their life? ~Recessive my arse: My dad, me (obviously) my brother, and now my son. I won’t even get into my dad’s 7 siblings. (some of which are shown here)
~As I read the article about my people’s pending doom, I thought back to the ridicule I experienced as a young child and then the near celebrity I received as I reached adulthood. I have grown to love my red hair and “angle kisses” (now that I have the sharpie off my skin from my sister connecting the dots in an attempt to see how many I had as a youth; why did I let her do that?) and consider them my trademark.
Quotable and red:
A young man marrying a redhead asked his father for some marital advice. The father said, “Just remind her who wears the pants in your family.” The evening arrived; the new husband tossed his pants to his bride and said, “Here put these on.” She did and said “I don’t fit into these.” “That’s right!” he said, “and don’t you forget who wears the pants in this family!” With that she flipped him her panties and said, “Try these on.” He looked at them and said, “I can’t get into your panties!” She said, “That’s right - and you won’t until your attitude changes!”
I turned off the water, grabbed a towel and opened the shower curtain. I was startled by the oldest boy who was quietly sitting on the toilet, and he got a kick out of my surprised squeal. Apparently he had been sitting there a while and I did not realize it. This is just one of the benefits of being Mom; you are never alone. While stepping out of the shower I teased the boy that he scared me and I didn’t know he was there. Why can’t they be this quiet when I want them to be?
In the twelve years hubs and I have been together, we have spent a number of nights apart that I could count on my hands.
~Thank god I will be gone because a world without Red is no place to live!
